Back when I used to work for a living, my group would regularly develop and release IT products to the users across our firm.   Before the first production release we would often do a “beta” release, which we knew contained bugs but which we also thought worked well enough for users to use effectively.  During the beta release period, we would collect reports of problems – bugs – and develop a plan to correct them, either during the beta release period or after we went into full production.

The Silver Muse is a late-stage beta release.  If you were to count the number of features and capabilities which exist on this ship, the number of problems is numerically small.  But they are problems nonetheless, many of which could easily been caught and corrected before we boarded.  So here is our bug list.

B001: Screws missing in some reading lamps by beds.  Risk: lamp detaching and injuring passenger or crew.  

B002: Incorrect information about dress code distributed to 600 passengers. Risk: passengers arriving without proper attire and being denied entry to reserved restaurant. Risk: conflict between passenger and crew. 

B003: “Do not disturb” door tags not ready on time.  Passengers required to use flimsy paper tags with no holes for hanging on door handle.  Risk: cabin staff could intrude on passenger at inopportune time.  Resolved: proper door tags distributed after several days at sea.

B004: Restaurant reservation requirements not understood or followed by passengers. Risk: passengers being unable to eat in intended location. Risk: unnecessary conflict between passengers and crew. 

B005: Water leaking on floor of bathroom. Risk: wet feet. Risk: passengers or crew slipping on wet floor, resulting in injury. 

B006: All toilets on several decks temporarily out of service due to failure of pressure flush system.  Risk: obvious. Resolution: all toilets now functioning.

B007: Inadequate process for dining room and table assignments on first night. Risk: passengers unable to dine with family and friends.  Risk: unnecessary conversations between passengers and crew on first day.  Resolution: no more first nights on maiden cruises for several years, at least. 

B008: Restaurant reservation requirements changed mid-cruise without adequate notice. Risk: passenger and crew confusion.  Resolution: this item determined to be the result of users not RTFM.

B009: Missing heaters in outdoor restaurant on pool deck. Risk: passengers being too cold to dine there.  

B010: Inadequate process for accommodating food allergies. Risk: unnecessarily denying dining options to passengers.  Risk: unnecessary conflict between passengers and crew. Risk: passengers needing to spend precious vacation time dealing with staff.  

B011: lids on at least two toilets in public lavatories broke off.  Risk: embarrassment.

B012: Wifi allowance is unclear and inadequate. Passengers required to take steps to explicitly logout of system; daily allowance of 1 hour doesn’t rollover if unused.  Risk: passengers unable to control usage and have access to network services.