Today was our last day – breakfast at the hotel, pack, check out, go for a walk and maybe a bite until our 2:00pm pickup to go to the airport for our 5:05 flight. We got to the airport about 2:40 (it’s only a few miles from our hotel, but traffic). Getting checked in, going through security, walking through the duty-free shop – there’s no other option – and then finding passport control and finally finding our gate (a very long walk) took another 30-40 minutes. We grabbed a bite to eat in a snack bar near the gate, then waited to be boarded. Through the boarding pass scan, then down the escalator to … a bus.

Wait on the hot bus until all the passengers for the flight have boarded one of the three buses. Ride about five miles at a very leisurely pace, apparently circling the entire airport. Board the plane, get settled in, get a glass of water from the attendant. Another person comes by and asks to see our boarding passes again. Another few minutes go by; I’m reading The NY Times online.

Then we get the news that they don’t know who’s actually on the plane. So we all have to gather our stuff, get back on the bus, ride all the way back to the terminal, wait until every passenger is in the gate area, and then – only then – can they check us in and let us board again. Which means ..

Wait on the hot bus until all the passengers for the flight have boarded one of the three buses. Ride about five miles at a very leisurely pace, apparently circling the entire airport. Board the plane, get settled in, get a glass of water from the attendant.

Well, not quite. They quickly brought a bus with the A/C already cooling and boarded the front cabin passengers, and drove us out the the plane. In a straight line. No circling the airport. At a much more brisk pace. Why it couldn’t work this way the first time, I don’t know. And why they didn’t know who was on the plane, I also don’t know. That was a first for me.

So anyway, it’s now an hour after our scheduled departure and they’re still boarding people etc. I have no idea what the departure slot situation is when we leave over an hour late, but it sort of doesn’t matter. As long as we take off soon.

I can picture the next announcement… “Ladies and gentlemen I’m sorry to announce that due to the delays in departure, the crews’ flight eligibility has expired. We will be returning you to the gate area while TAP Portugal locates another experienced crew to take you on your flight to New York.”

I hope not.

See you on the other side.